Growing Pains

Well, it's been an interesting couple of days around here.  I think it's finally happened: total and complete mutiny.  Grace has mounted a full-on push for independence and has taken to voicing her displeasure at just about everything I do.  I cannot even begin to count how many times per day I hear the word "No!"  They usually occur in multiples like, "No, No, Nooooo!  Mommy, No! Nooooooooooo!"  And we have, what? Another year and a half of this stage?  Ahhhhhhh!  It's almost comical, if it weren't so darn annoying!

I sensed things were changing when, on Monday at music class, Grace immediately left my lap and spent most of the class period either sitting all by herself in the center of our big circle, or walking around greeting other moms and kids.  Just last week at the same class, she cried because she was so overwhelmed after the class size doubled.  But, I am glad she is coming out of her little shell.  I love watching Grace interact with her "peers".  She often refers to her friends at music class during the week, and particularly loves singing the good-morning/goodbye song from class, where we say everyone's name.

I've been thinking lately, that the time will quickly come when I will be an annoyance to Grace.  When she'll want nothing more than for me to leave her alone and let her do her own thing.  A time when she won't need me anymore.  I will be crushed, I'm sure.  Although I do hope she'll grow to be a strong, independent person, it sure is hard to even think about letting go.  Yes, I know....I've got a long time before I have to worry about that, but it does help to put everything in perspective. To appreciate each and every stage, no matter how frustrating they may be.  Because time does fly, and in the blink of an eye, she will be grown and on her own.

Looking back on the last eighteen months, it has been a wonderful blur.  I sometimes try to remember what it was like to hold a newborn.  What it was like to hear those little gurgles and coos, to see her first smile, and the way she smelled.  I miss that so much.  But this is such a sweet stage, too.  I love that Grace and I can communicate now.  I love her sense of humor.  I love the mischievous little smile she flashes when she's up to no good.  I love listening to her talk and watching her master new skills. I love the little gap between her front teeth.  I love the way she runs: pumping that one arm from side to side.  I love her spontaneous hugs and kisses.  I love her songs and her silly dances.  I love her....my sweet little (soon-to-be big) girl.

I love you, Grace!